THE E.T. BIBLE: AUTHORIZED INTERGALACTIC VERSION 1.0
By Sarah H. Leslie on Mar 13, 2012 in Current Issues, Features
The E.T. Bible
By Jove!
AUTHORIZED INTERGALACTIC VERSION 1.0
For years there has been a discussion among missiologists and linguists concerning the proper translation of certain biblical passages into various languages in the entire world. Now, with the E.T. Bible, translation goes out of this world!
This cosmic Bible is truly Universal in its scope, adaptable for all people groups, outer space entities, nephilim, extraterrestrials, tranhumanoids, cyborgs, deities, clones, and any mutant ninja reptilians.
Developed with state-of-the-art world-changing dynamic equivalencies based on a computerized model of all transdimensional alien contacts documented throughout the past five millennia on planet Earth.
A techno-dimensional Bible for the emerging post-global era!
WHY A NEW TEXT?
Ancient astronaut theory teaches that super-intelligent beings have been visiting the earth through dimensional gates for eons. Early men worshipped space travelers as gods and recorded these divine encounters in hieroglyphs, megaliths, and stone tablets. Ancient folklore tells of visitation by beings from a distant land of flying saucers, and a Sanskrit text tells of gods in flying machines. This emerging supernatural level of encounter between gods and men is something that mankind has longed for. Now, for the first time, the E.T. Bible illuminates the path to spiritual oneness with the Cosmos!
From the prehistoric drawings through the Roswell incident, reports of strange and unexplainable sightings in the skies and alien abduction experiences have become part of an unofficial historic record. These supernatural encounters between Heaven and Earth are fully incorporated into the emerging official spiritual record. The E.T. Bible makes the quantum leap!
*Be prepared for your next alien abduction! You will be able to share the Cosmic Gospel with these alien creatures – using the new E.T. version!
Culturally Relevant!
Using ancient and modern mythologies and legends as a reference point, and in order to make this text culturally relevant to a wide variety of fabled space travelers and aliens, throughout the text “God” is alternately translated as:
Odin, Jupiter, Jove, Ra, Quetzalcoatl, Chewbacca, Zeus, Fred Flintstone, Apollo, Osiris, Solar Logos, Dionysius, J Lo, Utu, Enlil, Elvis, Pan, Diana, Darth Vader, Anu, Enki, Marduk, Dali Lama, Allah, Lakshmi, Papa, Moirae, Themis, Gomer Pyle, Aphrodite, Mars, Elousia, Baal, Captain Kirk, Thor, Captain Planet, Molech, Sophia, Mother Theresa, George Jetson, Jimmy Carter, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, Shiva, Superman, Flash Gordon, Mr. Spock, Corporal Klinger, and the aptly named Reverend Moon.
No more Textus Receptus!
Recent archaeological and linguistic discoveries have helped in understanding passages traditionally difficult to translate. Incorporated into the new E.T. Bible translation are passages from such cross-cultural and cosmically significant sacred texts as:
The Book of the Dead; Sumerian scribes; the Book of Jubilees; Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus; The Apocryphal Book of Enoch; the Dead Sea Scrolls; ancient astronaut theory; Chariots of the Gods; The Bhagavad Gītā; The Dune Trilogy; The Book of Urantia; all apocryphal, pseudepigraphical and Gnostic writings; ancient mythologies, folklore and legends; The DaVinci Code; astrological and zodiacal accounts; The Gaia Peace Atlas; modern science fiction; Men In Black; magical and alchemical writings; The Purpose Driven Life; Star Trek; Quantum theory; the Desert Fathers; oracles and ghost stories of spiritualism; Confronting the Powers; the Mayan calendar; Sex God; Masonic lore; Battlestar Galactica; fairy tales; The Aquarian Conspiracy; Conversations With God; and other inspirational and cosmic sources.
The E.T. Bible in PROPHECY!
The Mayan calendar reaches its zenith in December 2012 when these ancients believed that a Stargate in Heaven will open and Quetzalcoatl returns! The E.T. Bible’s copyrighted Cybereschatology features make this a cutting-edge Bible for de-coding all future events! Learn the latest methods of reading symbols, codes and deciphering hidden secrets!
Be Prepared and Stay Informed!
Commentary by leading scholars in sidebars throughout the text helps to clarify key questions. Topics include:
- Understanding the Intergalactic Purpose of the 7 Global Spheres
- How to Bring Heaven to Earth and Vice Versa
- Serpent Seed: How Aliens Tinkered with Human DNA
- How to Access Portals and Enter Stargates to the Heavenly Realm
- Jedi Leadership Training for Apostolic Networks
- Calling Down Alien Principalities
- Could You Be A Nephilim?
- Conducting Spiritual Warfare in the Galactic Heavenlies
- Discover your Planetary Destiny!
- Bert & Ernie Discuss the Potentiality of Cosmic Muppets
- Conduct Intergalactic Spiritual Warfare in Three Easy Steps
- Quantum Cosmogenesis and Trans-Techno Utopianism
- Evangelization Training for Close Encounters of the Third Kind
- Identification and Elimination of the Alien Reptilian Brain
- L. Ron Hubbard, channeling through Shirley MacLaine, explains his Thetans and Battleship Earth.
- Alice Bailey Explains the Significance of the system of Sirius, the planet Venus, and the mythical land of Shamballa, the residence of Sanat Kumara, “Lord of the World”
- Djwhal Khul on the coming Maitreya and the necessity of a Great Invocation
- Psycho-Cosmic Counseling for Abused Aliens
- Demon or E.T.? Revising the Negative Stereotypes
Special Features:
- New, expanded definition of “ethnos” to include all planetary creature-states
- Multi-lingual paraphrasing adapted to any cyber-creatures as they manifest
- A gospel of inclusive cosmic simplicity, enveloping all creature groups
- A comprehensive study of astrological cosmograms, star-charts and horoscopes
- Alien contextualization and redemptive analogies
- A post-global salvation message for ushering in the Cosmic Christ
“As Above, So Below”
- Erik von Daniken, author of Chariots of the Gods, and expert on early alien contact with earthlings, once remarked that he felt that “today’s science” would not accept such extraterrestrial evidence, as “the time is simply not right”. He argued that it was first necessary to “prepare” mankind for a “wonderful new world.
- Ron McGatlin of OpenHeaven ministries proclaimed on March 8, 2012 that: “In the kingdom of Christ Jesus there is one people with one Father of all. The Jerusalem from above is the mother of us all. The… earthly is becoming the heavenly as it was originally created to be. It is becoming a visible living manifestation of Spirit God to show forth God’s glorious attributes. All things shall be gathered into Christ Jesus in the kingdom of God on earth as it is in heaven.”
- Eugene Peterson – in his cutting-edge paraphrase The Message – included the cosmic phrase “as above, so below,” adapting the ancient tenets of Hermeticism to our emerging times.
The World is Ready for the E.T. Bible!
Church leaders and E.T. experts around the world are recognizing the need to reach out to aliens with the emerging Cosmic Gospel message:
- Father Jose Gabriel Funes in a long interview with the L’Osservatore Romano newspaper said there is a certain possibility of intelligent life elsewhere in the universe, and that such notion “doesn’t contradict our faith.” Another Vatican astronomer, Guy Consolmagno concluded that chances are better than not that mankind is facing a near-future discovery of extraterrestrial intelligence (Monsignor Corrado Balducci even went so far a few years ago to suggest that aliens were already interacting with earth and that some of the Vatican’s leaders are aware of it).
- “How can we rule out that life may have developed elsewhere,” asked Funes. “Just as we consider earthly creatures as ‘a brother,’ and ‘sister,’ why should we not talk about an ‘extraterrestrial brother’? It would still be part of creation.”
- Muslim and Jewish leaders joined Funes to say their religion could accommodate an ET reality….
- Paul Davies of The Atlantic Monthly wrote in 2003 that the discovery of even a single bacterium somewhere beyond Earth could force mankind to revise its understanding of who we are and where we fit into the cosmic scheme of things. Davies speculated that such a find could throw the human race into a spiritual identity crisis that could leave some gasping for faith in God.
- Professor Anthony Tambasco of Georgetown University not only believes the world is ready for ET, but responding to NASA’s recent press releases about life potentially existing on Mars, said that if the discovery of life is substantiated, “it will not unravel traditional biblical convictions, but rather provide an opportunity to enlarge or broaden them.” HERE
The post-global era is upon us!
Will you be ready for alien evangelism?
Purchase your copy of the E.T. Bible today!
Published by Emergent Cosmos, Inc.
Sold exclusively through Domergent Enterprises
E.T. orders – phone home
See also:
RICK WARREN REACHES OUT TO EXTRATERRESTRIALS